Friday, November 22, 2013

Well you can forget I told you that culinary foam is all the go.  As of right now, it's out, having trickled down onto Olive Garden's menu with the Never Ending™ Foams di Rome Bowl, as shown below:


From Olive Garden's new menu, page 30, under Tastes di Italia.

Olive Garden's annexing of culinary foam is bad action for everyone everywhere:

Shareholders see that this is clearly a dumb business move for Olive Garden. It is virtually impossible for customers to fill up on foam because of its air quantity index. Patrons who order All You Can Eat foam will be camped in the restaurant for hours, slowing down table turnover and reducing profits.

Culinary Artists liked the healthy, creative, modern, flavorful and textural qualities that foam brought to the table. Now that down-scale restaurants are recklessly serving the once-favored flavor accompaniment, chefs are informing foam, "You are now ketchup to me!" 

Snobs are upset that, with foam out of the picture, they won't know how to place the most upscale order at the table. These nice people are rightfully worried that the next new thing will be cooking with feathers, or the "feathering" of food that I mentioned earlier in this blog.

What you can do: Continue to check in with me, as I will be on the hunt for the latest in culinary trends. For now, stay away from any restaurant that offers "fusion" as that movement is now seen as distastefully inauthentic. Until further notice, just eat Asian street food and you should be fine.

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