My mother-in-law lives nearby and her house was burgled the other night by area rug thieves. This rocked her world because, as everybody knows, area rugs "ground" a room. And now she's left stuck to the wall of that carnival ride where the floor drops out from under you, which is a lot safer for her than taking a spin on a floor with area rugs.

The rug burglars probably left through my mother-in-law's garage, and on their way out, they may have snapped this photo of the step ladder that she's obviously favoring over the walker she's supposed to be using. It's likely that they considered stealing the step ladder, to curtail risky "climbing up and reaching out for stuff" activities. Then, picturing her doing those same activities on a swivel chair, they must have decided to leave it behind and get the hell out of there. We were in enough trouble already.