Listen, there's no whey I'm done talking about cheese curds. That's because I haven't even told you the best thing I learned about them in Quebec and it's called POUTINE.

If you've ever been drinking after hours in Baltimore (Cut to Baltimore accent, GO!) an’ yew're tee tarred to drov haome, and yew'd eat anyfink on erf -- yew probly of wount up eedin gravy fries at the doiner, hon (Good job!). Well, poutine is gravy fries with cheese curds mixed right in there with it. It's salty and gooey and hot and it comes to you in a mound, like a flavor cairn memorializing French Canadian resourcefulness: 

Don't forget that the word "cairn" is the worst sounding word in the English language.

Many Canadians are embarrassed by poutine because of its low brow ingredients. There's no need for that because now you can order upscale versions of it in fancy restaurants and spend more money that way. Of course, I gravy-tated toward this and ordered:

Pulled Pork Poutine, Fresh Cheese, Chipotle Sauce, 

Deep Fried Sage and Bearnaise Sauce

(notice above, no mention of french fries, curds or gravy 

and p.s. fried sage: thank you!)

However, if you want to tease a French Canadian, you can put poutine on his birthday cakes, as shown here: