Thank you to my readers who forwarded me this ripped-shirt photo of Captain Kirk:  

And you guys are right, I made a mistake when I wrote that the black part of his uniform top is a tattoo of a dickey. As we can see in the photo, the collar area is clearly a part of the shirt. Here, Kirk's flesh looks not only tat free, but pure and luminescent. I'm guessing that Star Trek's ratings shot up after this hint of goodness happened because they revved things up with this Tarzan-esque shirt tear:

 

And famously, this casual laceration revealing just the one nipple, which seems to be asking the question, "S'up?"

 

How could I have forgotten these ripped-shirt episodes of Star Trek that aired when I was a little girl? They gave me a funny feeling all over that left me wanting him to give me a piggy back.