I was doing important research online, looking up names that end in the swanky sound "ington" to support my argument that Prince William and Kate Middleton's baby would benefit from being named Beginnington Middleton Endsor Windor, when I stumbled onto this:

I need names ending with -ington to match brother and sister's names

I am Suzette, I am 18, and expecting my third and final child. my other son and my daughter both have a -ington ending name. my first child my daughter is named Lexington Britta and my second child my son is named Kovington Micah. Thank you Suzette

Okay, hi, it's me, Conniezington, again. So in response to Suzette's entry, lots of people on the site weighed in, not only with recommendations of "ington" names, but also to judge some of her standout life choices. In an effort to defend herself, Suzette wrote:

...having third child was not my decision the birth control mirena* a piece broke off and I got pregnant again. So thanks and all my kids have the same dad by the way...I lost my innocence 2 him and we're getting married in October.

Okay, there you go.  Thanks to her explanation, that chronicle is no longer depressing. But exposing Suzette to the following name recommendations from this well-wisher does make me feel a little hopeless:

I have 2 boys...bennington and mackenzington...my 3rd is on the way and he will be lukensington.

*I looked up Mirena online and it turns out that it is a Bayer product. Bayer calls Mirena "Birth Control For Busy Moms." Since Mirena is responsible for making Suzette even busier, maybe she could name her third baby "Mirena©zington."