We gave our turtle, Natasha, some "feeder fish" for Christmas because we heard that it would be a real surprise for the reptile who has everything.  Natasha is a red-eared slider, a common pet that has been banned in the US since 1975, but is easily purchased in Chinatown as a joke gift by friends who once heard you say you liked turtles.  Although at first you don't want this animal because of the expensive aquarium and filtering system required to keep her (him?) alive, you soon grow to appreciate her for all the times he doesn't give you salmonella poisoning.

After the non-water members of our family opened their Christmas presents, we remembered that we had a holiday treat for Natasha.  But the second those wide-eyed little guppies plopped into Natasha's habitat, they looked a whole hell of a lot like pets too, not only to us, but also to Natasha, who normally eats pellets and hadn't yet identified with her hungry, outdoorsy species.  And then BAM! -- the light went on, Natasha's nature awakened, and we had to watch -- we're not robots -- as poor Carrot Top, Diablo, General Finn and Li'l Oscar (all named posthumously) swam for their lives.  

With no bodies to flush and having lost our appetites, we held off on a memorial brunch for those valiant little fish until the day after Christmas.  We couldn't make eye contact with Natasha, whom we all agreed had really "changed."  She picked up on that, and for a long time she gave us the cold shoulder.  Recently though, we've relied on forgiveness to improve our relationship.  Just today, I was able to share with her that I've also been known to do crazy things when I'm hungry.