Although I consider myself to be a morning person, I'm super tired today because of a piercing foot cramp that kept me up for most of the night.  After enduring the pain for a long time while lying in bed, I got up and walked around my living room like those poor, innocent prison inmates on Downton Abbey.  Ultimately, I knew I needed to wake up Bo for a foot rub, but in order to convince him of the reasonableness of that idea, I got the kitchen shears, shook him and said, "I'm about to black out from a foot cramp. Do me a favor and snip this tendon here, or you could just rub my foot for a minute."  He told me to go eat a banana.

Anyway, I need to perk up, because we're having a staff meeting to initiate a new employee at noon, and as the part-time, some might say, "pretend" office manager of Bo's orthopedic practice, it's up to me to pull these things together.  I'll kick off the meeting by welcoming her to the team.  Then I'll ask one of our medical assistants to administer the customary trans-vaginal ultrasound.  Then we'll all watch to see how she reacts.  After that, I'll say, "just kidding, but the trust fall is for realzies."  Then, if the whole staff agrees that she has fully and willingly dropped into our arms, we'll move onto the part where she sings Frere Jacques and then we'll break for lunch.